(fingertips)

one night, i wondered,
(what was wrong with me?)
one night, i wondered,

(why shouldn't i?)
what this sensation was,
and how to cope with its rage.

so that night, i laid quietly
(what is stopping me?)
while the cars passed,

and the windows covered,
and the world asleep...
(how do I--?)

my hands, cradling my frame
as heartless as the void before it,
becoming cold
(what are they talking about?)

as i contorted in thought,
and in body and mind
(why can't i feel what they felt?)

my
(fingertips,)
cold and tired body

longing for answers.

-lj
3 September 2017