Feeling

I feel the burning in my chest,
the feeling of Hell in my eyes,

as these tears fall and swell my eyes.
I feel the pain 

of a million sledgehammers in my head,
the feeling of 

my bones cracking beneath my skin,
as abrasion after abrasion

 becomes silent, hidden expression.
I feel the injection in my arm,

the feeling of rejection
of everything good in this world,

as comfort and nourishment
escape my faint, yet firm grasp;

the feeling of this white elephant known as I,
who dwells in my own soul, only wants to be held.

-LJ

15 January 2015

[written during a long-ago 

episode of depression]